When you have to visit a public toilet, you usually find a line of women, so you smile politely and take your place.
Once it’s your turn,you check for feet under the cubicle doors. Every cubicle is occupied. Finally, a door opens and you dash in, nearly knocking down the woman leaving the cubicle.
You get in to find the door won’t lock.It doesn’t matter. The dispenser for the modern "seat covers" (invented by someone’s Mum, no doubt) is handy, but empty. You would hang your bag on the door hook,if there were one, but there isn’t – so you carefully but quickly drape it around your neck, (Mum would turn over in her grave if you put it on the FLOOR!), yank down your pants, and assume "The Stance."
In this position your aging, toneless thigh muscles begin to shake. You’d love to sit down, but you certainly hadn’t taken time to wipe the seat or lay toilet paper on it, so you hold "The Stance."
This is a true story about a recent wedding that took place at
University of Botswana. This was a huge wedding with over 300 guests.
After the wedding at the reception, the groom got up on stage and took
the microphone to talk to the crowd. He said that he wanted to thank
everyone for coming, many from long distances, to support them at their Wedding.
He especially wanted to thank the bride’s and groom’s families for coming and to thank his new father-in-law for providing such a fabulous reception.
1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.
2. Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs.
3. If a dog is gorgeous, other dogs don’t hate it.
4. Dogs don’t notice if you call them by another dog’s name.
5. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.
6. A dog’s parents never visit.
7. Dogs do not hate their bodies.
8. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point
"I can do all things through Jesus Christ who strengthens me"
Three pastors took a day off and decided to go fishing
after a busy Sunday.
They agreed its so difficult preaching to people all the
time and no one preaches to them. Sitting by the river with little
response from the hooks one pastor thought of sharing his heart with others. He said "guys its rare to get such an opportunity to be among ourselves like this. It would be good if we look into our lives and help each other with our weaknesses".
An application was for employment
A program was a TV show
A cursor used profanity
And a keyboard was on a piano!
Memory was something that you lost with age
And a CD was a bank account
And if you had a corrupted disk Read more…
1.What word starts with a ‘C’ and ends with a ‘T’. It is harry on the outside and moist on the inside.
2. What do you see when u look at ‘apenisinmymouth’
3. What four letter word start with ‘F’ ends with ‘K’ and if you cant get get one you can use your fingers.
1. A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he wants. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t want.