Little Bruce and Jenny are only 10 years old, but they know they are in love. One day they decide that they want to get married, so Bruce goes to Jenny’s father to ask him for her hand.
Bruce bravely walks up to him and says, “Mr. Smith, me and Jenny are in love and I want to ask you for her hand in marriage.”
Thinking that this was just the cutest thing, Mr. Smith replies, “Well Bruce, you are only 10.. Where will you two live?”
Given that we live in a world where even poor farmers in Africa have cell phones, it’s understandable that we take these devices with us everywhere. They’ve become a part of us. And yet, they have no place at a dinner table with your date – and this goes both ways.
Actually talking on the phone isn’t really as much of a problem as it used to be, but this activity has been replaced by one that’s even more annoying: texting. If you’re looking at your phone more than you’re looking at the girl, you’re doing it wrong. Fortunately, this is something most guys can understand, since it’s usually the girl they’re with that’s attached their face to a cell phone.
During a robbery in Thembisa,South Africa, the bank robber shouted to everyone in the bank:
“Don’t move. The money belongs to the State. Your life belongs to you.”
Everyone in the bank laid down quietly. This is called “Mind Changing Concept” Changing the conventional way of thinking.
When a lady lay on the table provocatively, the robber shouted at her: “Please be civilized! This is a robbery and not a rape!”
This is called “Being Professional” Focus only on what you are trained to do!
When the bank robbers returned home, the younger robber, Themba (28 yrs old MBA-trained and Qualified CA ) told the older robber,
Bra Shakes (50 yrs old, who has only completed Year 6 in primary school): “Big brother, let’s count how much we got.”
The older robber rebutted and said: “You are very stupid. There is so much money it will take us a long time to count. Tonight, the TV news
will tell us how much we robbed from the bank!” Read more…
A delivery store worker says he is ‘proud’ to be the owner of Brooklyn’s Smallest Penis.
Nick Gilronan, 27, fought off competition from five other entrants in the event at Kings County Bar in the borough of New York city.
The event, which also featured a 55-year-old calling himself ‘Rip van Dinkle’, was watched by over 100 people. Read more…
1. A ghost first looks both sides before crossing the road
2. The T.V still makes noise even if you put it on vol 1
3. Millionaires have a “gate Man” instead of an electric gate
4. A flashback plays for 40 mins
5. If you watch Part II for 20 minutes and you can tell what happened on part I Read more…
Two little boys, ages 8 and 10, are excessively mischievous. They are always getting into trouble and their parents know if any mischief occurs in their town, the two boys are probably involved.
The boys’ mother heard that a preacher in town had been successful in disciplining children, so she asked if he would speak with her boys. The preacher agreed, but he asked to see them individually. Read more…
Oh man, we feel your pain. There is nothing worse knowing a hot chick that you fancy the ass off and she thinks that you are just “that close friend”.
A wife, being the romantic sort, sent her husband a text: �If you are
sleeping, send me your dreams. If you are laughing, send me your smile.
If you are eating, send me a bite. If you are drinking send me a sip. If
you are crying, send me your tears. I love you!”
The husband, typically non-romantic, texted this reply: Read more…