A young Indian boy asked his Grandfather, Gramps…. what is the difference between a mistress, girlfriend and wife.
The Grandfather replied, … a mistress is like honey, can’t eat too much because too sweet, you’ll get diabetes. Your girlfriend is like mutton curry and rice…. can only have some days otherwise cholesterol will go too high. The wife is like peanut butter & jam…. when you got nothing to eat, you eat that.
A lady calls the police to report her husband is missing. The police arrive and ask for a description. She tells them he’s 6 foot 2 inches tall, blonde wavy hair and has a smile that makes everybody love him. The police then go to the next door neighbor to verify this report and the lady next door tells the police, “You can’t believe her. He’s 5 foot 4 inches tall, has no hair and he wears a perpetual frown on his face.” The neighbor then goes and asks the lady why she gave the police such a false report. She replies, “Just because I reported him missing, doesn’t mean I wanted him back!”
A young man was planning to get married and asked his doctor how he could tell if his bride is a virgin.
The doctor said, ‘Well, you need three things. A can of red paint, a can of blue paint and a shovel..’
The man was astonished and asked, ‘So what do I do with these?’
The doctor replied, ‘Before the wedding night, you paint your one ball red and the other ball blue. If she says, ‘That’s the strangest pair of balls I ever saw’, you hit her head with the shovel.’…. .
A man went to police station for filing report for his missing wife:
Man: I lost my wife (misty eyes)
Inspector: What is her height
Man: I never noticed
Inspector: Slim or healthy
Man: Not slim can be healthy
Inspector: Colour of eyes
Man: Never noticed
Inspector: Colour of hair Read more…