What a girl wants a guy to do:
•   Give her one of your t-shirts to sleep in
•   Leave her cute text notes
•   Kiss her in front of your friends
•   Tell her she looks beautiful
•   Look into her eyes when you talk to her
•   Just walk around with her
•   Forgive her for her mistakes Read more…

A uniformed police officer was caught on CCTV having sex with a woman on the hood of a car. The bizarre scene, which was witnessed by a nearby Chihuahua, was filmed by a hidden camera set up by New Mexico police to catch vandalism at a nearby property.

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A little girl asked her mother: ‘How did the human race appear?’ The mother answered, ‘God made Adam and Eve; they had children; and so was all mankind made.’ Two days later the girl asked her father the same question. The father answered, ‘Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved.’ The confused girl returned to her mother and said, ‘Mum, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Dad said they developed from monkeys?’ The mother answered, ‘Well, Dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family, and your father told you about his.’

Two men we’re talking
1st man:I’m getting married because I’m tied of eating outside,cleaning,doing laundry and washing

2nd man smile and replied:I’m getting divorce because of de same reason…..

Lolest who is right between those two????

After being married for thirty years, a wife asked her husband to describe her.

He looked at her slowly, then said:

"You’re A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K."

She asks: "What does that mean?"

He said, "Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Foxy, Gorgeous, Hot.

She smiled happily and said:

"Oh, that’s so lovely. …. What about I, J, K?"

He said, "I’m Just Kidding…!"

His left eye is still swollen……….but the doctor has informed him that he is likely to see things much clearer in the future…